Warnings and disclaimers in first part
Dinner that evening was a subdued affair. Duo had cooked hamburgers and eaten without speaking, obviously in deep thought. Trowa didn’t know what had happened during the day since Duo had been away from the house, not returning until the sky was growing dark. He allowed the other man some time, aware Duo was suffering from what they had discovered.
Once the food was gone, he gently led Duo into the living room, forcing the smaller man to sit on the couch. Handing Duo the remote, he ordered, “Relax for a little while. I’ll clean the kitchen.”
Receiving no arguments, he did as promised; proud he knew how to do things now he couldn’t have done before his arrival at Duo’s home, such as run the dishwasher or make coffee on his own. It was strange to discover this late in life he enjoyed doing the seemingly mundane tasks, knowing he owed Duo for the lessons. Returning to the living room with two beers, he sat on the couch beside the braided man, sitting sideways so he could look at the other man. Duo appeared oblivious to what was on the screen, eyes unfocused as he stared past the TV. Wishing he could do more, Trowa gave Duo a beer, brows lifting when the bottle was raised automatically.
Taking the remote gently with one hand, Trowa turned the sound down so it was background noise, “Turn around so your back is to me.”
Duo started at the sound of his voice, turning as instructed after giving him a baffled look. When Trowa dug his fingers into the tense muscles of Duo’s neck he heard a gasp followed by a long sigh. “Tell me what happened.”
“I met with the sheriff, then the other ranchers. There are only nine of us, so it wasn’t that hard. I had to tell them I didn’t suspect them of taking my animals, or of causing trouble. All of them offered their support. I suggested they begin patrols of their own herds so this doesn’t happen to them.” Duo shook his head, reaching back to pull the piece of leather from his hair and rubbing his scalp as his braid began to unravel. “I don’t think they have anything to worry about, but I asked them to be careful.”
“You believe someone is targeting you specifically,” Trowa mused, rubbing the tense muscles of Duo’s back and taking guilty pleasure in the act. He sighed when soft hair feathered across his hands, stifling the urge to shove his hands in the thick locks.
Tilting his head to the left as Trowa kneaded his right shoulder, Duo sighed softly, “I know I’m being targeted. I’m the only one having problems and there were some issues at the end of last year. That didn’t amount to anything more than an annoyance. Whoever is doing this has something against me. The number of cattle missing is more than a small problem and I won’t make a profit at the end of the season, which is okay for one season. I’m actually lucky I’ve made a profit every year so far, but it’s more than a little bothersome that after six years I’ll take a loss for the first time. Luckily, I’ll be able to make up the profits with next year’s herd as long as the calves don’t go missing.” With another sigh, the L2 native shook his head, “What bothers me the most is not being able to figure out why someone would do this. The war ended eight years ago, so it’s been too long for it to be revenge.”
Hoping to take Duo’s mind off his problems for a little while, Trowa put his hands under the other man’s shirt, moving them up the hard back with firm motions. Hearing a sound of surprise, he leaned forward slightly, making sure he didn’t get closer than necessary. “This isn’t a seduction, Duo. I want to help you relax a little. Forget that it’s me touching you and pretend I’m a masseuse,” he suggested, blinking when Duo pulled the t-shirt over his head and let it fall to the floor, momentarily ensnared by the rippling muscles in the other man’s back.
Listening to the sound of the television, Trowa tried to distance himself from what he was doing, staggered by the sharp lance of lust that speared him. Firmly reminding himself Duo didn’t want a relationship, physical or otherwise, Trowa kept his breath even while working his thumbs into the muscles, sighing as he moved his hands under Duo’s hair, stunned by the silken texture. It soon became undeniable he was attracted to Duo, shifting slightly in hopes of easing his painfully confined erection, not lessened by the moans and gasps of pleasure from the smaller man.
Duo’s muscles where finally starting to loosen when they abruptly went taut, cobalt eyes shooting to the TV, narrowed as he focused on the screen. Curious, Trowa turned to look, growling as a picture of his former lover appeared, the blonde smiling and shaking hands with a politician known for his charity work. Paying more attention, Trowa rolled his eyes as a reporter went on about Quatre’s numerous donations to several charities.
“He really is a sanctimonious son of a bitch, isn’t he?”
Duo’s eyes went from the screen to Trowa’s face, registering surprise for a moment before he began to laugh, “I guess that’s one way to put it. He’s so damn fake.” Shaking his head, the braided man turned away, “I’m surprised it took you so long to see him for what he really is.”
It was shaming to have to admit, “So am I. In my own defense, he was always courteous and giving. He wasn’t mean to me, not outright.”
“Then why did you two break up? I assumed it had something to do with his behavior.”
Unable to help himself, Trowa let his eyes linger on the junction of skin where shoulder met neck, wondering how it would taste. “That is why we broke up, but it wasn’t one big thing. It was a lot of small things I began to notice. He would show his disapproval when I went on assignments with the Preventers that kept me away from home by giving me the silent treatment, or he would show his distaste for my wardrobe by giving me a shake of his head and pointing at something else to wear. There were some teasing comments about the way I talked at times that proved I didn’t have a formal education. When I started to add all of those things together, I realized they weren’t teasing at all. They were snide comments and insults prettied up to sound like something else. Once I figured that out, I couldn’t ignore them.” Letting out a small hiss, he gentled his fingers on Duo’s skin, no longer kneading but lightly caressing. “I tried to tell myself he was only joking or doing things to help me better myself, but it was impossible. Those things he said seemingly in jest were suddenly painful. The final nail in the coffin was when he told me not to speak at all during a party thrown by one of his business associates. He didn’t want me to embarrass him with my lack of education.”
Looking over his shoulder, Duo’s eyes were full of sympathy, “I’m sorry he said that to you, Trowa. I know how it feels to be insulted about something you had no control over.”
Moving his hands down, he pressed his thumbs into the muscles on either side of Duo’s spine. “When did you know he was a jerk? After the war?”
“Long before that. He was nice if it was the two of us, but he let me know he already had a claim on you, so I needed to stay away. I almost tried to see if I could get you in bed just to piss him off.”
Trowa’s breath stuttered for an instant before returning to normal, “Why didn’t you?”
“We needed to be united as a team. It would have been fun as hell to seduce you, but it would have caused friction between all of us. Anyway, if I had wanted sex, Heero would have been easier and more accessible.” Duo snorted, lifting his shoulders, “Having sex with Zechs would have been easier than getting to you. Quatre had you wrapped around his little finger and everyone knew it.”
The phrase had Trowa frowning, insulted, “It wasn’t like that.”
Turning, Duo lifted an eyebrow. “Every time Quatre needed something, you damn near hurt yourself trying to get it. I thought about telling you, but you wouldn’t have believed me. You had to learn for yourself.”
Silently, he admitted the other man was right. He wouldn’t have listened, believing Quatre to be the one person that understood him. Not wanting to dwell on that depressing thought, he asked about something else. “You think it would have been easy to seduce me? I’m not a pushover and I’m not naïve.”
Without warning, Duo turned his body, putting both his legs over Trowa’s and leaning close. Eyes half-closed, Duo’s tongue darted out to moisten pink lips, causing Trowa’s lungs to forget how to work. His mind went totally blank when Duo smiled at him slowly, more provocative than anything he had seen before. Unconsciously, his fingers tightened where they remained on the other man’s skin, already imagining how Duo would taste when Duo was abruptly gone, standing over him with a smirk. “It’s hard to believe, but I do have some charm when I feel the need.” Trowa blinked when Duo leaned down suddenly and kissed the tip of his nose. “You’re cute when you’re confused, Trowa. I have to get in bed. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Several minutes after Duo had disappeared up the stairs, Trowa took a deep breath and let it out slowly, hoping his heart would eventually slow to its normal pace. The sensual side he had just glimpsed was enough to have him wondering how much more alluring Duo would be if he had been serious. Embarrassing as it was, Trowa knew if Duo had tried to seduce him during the war, he likely would have succeeded, Quatre or not. The hint of what he had seen was irresistible and that had been merely to prove a point. There was no way to know how much more convincing Duo would have been if he had actually wanted Trowa to share his bed.
Calling himself ten kinds of fool to be entertaining the idea, Trowa rose and cut off the power switch the way Duo had shown him. After ensuring the other lights were off, he made his way up the stairs, freezing when he started to pass Duo’s room and glanced inside. The other man had clearly been getting ready for bed, the dim light coming from one small lamp and giving the room a warm glow. Duo was sitting in the center of the bed, wearing only a pair of dark blue boxer shorts that had the shine of silk.
There wasn’t an ounce of spare weight on Duo’s anywhere, all muscle and bone, obviously thinking of something unpleasant as he clasped his knees to his chest, gaze focused on the window. Trowa wasn’t looking at how attractive Duo was, although that was in the back of his mind. What captured his attention was the sadness he could see, clearly expressed in the distant cobalt eyes.
Without thinking, he moved into Duo’s room and sat on the bed, pulling the smaller man into his lap and simply holding on. “Trowa, what…?”
“Just let me hold you,” he asked softly, needing to offer comfort but not knowing how.
He assumed Duo would stiffen or fight the embrace and was stunned when the other man nearly melted into him, putting his head on Trowa’s shoulder and fisting his hands into Trowa’s shirt. Feeling his heart soften, Trowa silently wondered what this man was doing to him without even trying. Duo’s contradictions were pulling at him, making him want to solve the mysteries the small man held.
His hands moved over Duo’s hair in a soothing gesture as he buried his nose in the softness, inhaling the scent deeply. While he could remember Duo’s warning not to get attached to anything at the ranch, he feared it was already too late. “Talk to me, Duo.”
“I wish I knew who was doing this to me. Who could hate me so much they would enjoy causing problems for me? I haven’t done anything to anyone here and I consider these people my friends. I can’t see how any of them could do this.”
“No one has any complaints or grievances against you?”
Duo’s voice was slightly muffled by Trowa’s shirt, but that didn’t stop the tall man from hearing the worry. “No. If anything, everyone was happy when I bought the land. The previous owner died about fifteen years ago and left the property to his son and daughter. From what I heard, they came and looked at the property and decided they didn’t want anything to do with it after they took anything of value from the house. They put it up for sell and wouldn’t even consider selling the land in sections. They wanted to sell it all or nothing. Most of the ranchers around here do well, but none of them have that kind of extra money.”
The small man fell silent for several minutes but didn’t let go of Trowa. Trowa was glad to be there for Duo to talk to, curious what the other man did to relieve stress when he was alone. He didn’t have time to ask, Duo speaking again, “Before I bought the land, I met with each family in the county to ensure no one wanted it. Some of them wanted parcels that bordered their land, but no one wanted all of it. Once the sale was final, at a much lower price than originally asked, I made arrangements for the people that wanted additional land to buy what they wanted. I almost made as much back as I paid for the land to begin with, and I still get monthly payments from some of them.”
“How did you get the owners to lower the selling price?”
“That was easy. I pointed out that no one had bought the land for fifteen years and it was going to take a lot of work to make it usable. The damn buildings were falling apart and the house was in bad shape. I tore down the barn and chicken coop that were here and built new ones because the old ones were so bad it would have cost more to repair them than it did to rebuild. Their lawyer recommended they take the offer because it was the best they were going to get.”
“Has anyone moved into the area since you bought the land?” Trowa was trying to think of anyone that would hold a grudge against the other man, coming up with one Duo clearly hadn’t thought of.
There was a hint of amusement when Duo spoke, “In case you haven’t noticed, this isn’t exactly a booming metropolis. The people that live here are here because their parents grew up here and their grandparents before them. No one would move to a place like this.”
“You did,” he pointed out gently, blinking when he heard the husky tone of his own voice.
Duo didn’t seem to notice the change. “Yeah, but I was looking for something out of the way. I wanted somewhere no one would bother me and I’d missed Earth.”
Trowa understood instantly, “You wanted somewhere Quatre wouldn’t find you. I’m so sorry.”
The other man leaned back, looking into Trowa’s eyes for a moment. “He knew a long time ago. Do you really think it was coincidence he knew who to call and where you were? He paid me a visit a few months after I bought the place and he wasn’t happy with me.”
“What did he want?”
“Part of the deal we made was that I would stay as far away from the three of you as possible, especially you. He considered two hundred miles too close to Heero and four hundred wasn’t far enough away from you. He told me to go back to the colonies.”
Trowa’s eyes grew round when Duo leaned against him again, bangs tickling his neck. Hands no longer gripped at him, one resting on his thigh and the other on his opposite hip. After swallowing hard, he spoke softly, not wanting the smaller man to realize what he was doing and get up. “Apparently you didn’t leave. Why’d he let it go?”
“I told him if he didn’t leave me alone I’d tell you three everything, from the war up until then. I don’t know if any of you would have believed me, but it worked. He occasionally still calls to make sure I haven’t forgotten I owe him for something he did for me once.”
There was no way Duo was going to tell him of the favor Quatre had done, so Trowa didn’t even ask. Taking a risk, he rubbed the palm of his hand down Duo’s spine, controlling a shiver when he heard a sound that resembled a purr. “You’ve seen Wufei recently,” he stated as he applied pressure on the muscular back. “You’ve been to see Heero. Does Quatre not know or does he not care?”
“Oh, he knows and he definitely cares, but he can’t do anything about it. They got in contact with me, not the other way around. I think he was more worried about you, to be honest. He didn’t want me near you in any way, shape, or form. It kind of makes me wonder why he called me to get you. It goes against everything he ever wanted.”
“We aren’t together anymore. Maybe that’s why he asked you for help,” suggested Trowa.
“He didn’t ask me for help, Trowa. He told me I had to help you. As for you not being together, do you really think that matters to him? I think this is more like a test of some sort, but I can’t think of what sense he could make of it.”
“Maybe he wants to see if you can seduce me,” offered Trowa, only half joking. If someone had suggested the idea a week ago it would have been amusing. Now it was something he was thinking about again and again, not the slightest bit amused.
His musings vanished when Duo snorted, “Not likely. Maybe he wants to prove he can make me do anything. Seducing you is not what he wants me to do.”
“He’s always warned you to stay away from me and then all of a sudden throws us together. You’re right. It doesn’t make any sense. I guess I was hoping he finally realized we were over.”
The rumble of Duo’s laugh was felt in Trowa’s chest, his body tensing at the low sound he found tantalizing. “Trowa, you are what he wants and he considers you his property. He’ll never think of you as over unless you do something he can’t deny; doing that will land you on his permanent shit list. I don’t know which is worse.”
“What could I do he can’t deny?” Trowa asked, flustered at the realization Duo was right. Quatre would always retain a hold on him until he did something to break that chain. “Do I need to take an ad out in a newspaper and announce to everyone I don’t want him and haven’t for over a year? Would anything less than that work?”
“I don’t think that’s necessary, but if all else fails it might work. The first thing you need to do is stop depending on him for everything.”
The very notion was insulting, “I don’t depend on him for anything.”
“So you live on your own? You cook your own food, wash your own clothes and dishes and make up your own bed in the morning?”
“I’ve been looking for an apartment, but nothing is available,” Trowa frowned.
When Duo stood, Trowa immediately missed the warmth and presence of the other man in his lap. When Duo began to pace the room, muscles bunching and stretching, Trowa decided it wasn’t so bad as long as he was able to watch the smaller man move. He was already resigned that he wanted to find out how good Duo was in bed and forced himself to pay attention to what Duo was saying instead of the surprisingly long legs he could imagine wrapped around him.
“Nothing is available because anyone that can pick up a newspaper or turn on a television is aware who you are. No one is going to do anything that would put them on Quatre’s bad side. I’m pretty sure you were with him when he got annoyed at a restaurant because he thought a waiter was too slow. He bought the place so he could fire the poor guy. Who wants to make someone that powerful and wealthy mad?”
“You would.”
Duo stopped moving at the statement, turning to stare at Trowa for several seconds before snorting a laugh, “Yeah, but I’m crazy.”
“Not so crazy that you defy him outright,” Trowa muttered under his breath.
“You don’t defy him at all. You still look to him for help. Who was the first person you called when your truck quit?”
“Quatre has the resources to offer help more easily than anyone else.”
“Trowa, you called Quatre even though Heero was much closer and could have told you the same thing just as fast. What would you have done if Quatre had come to get you and escort you to Heero’s, telling you the whole way you needed to go back home?”
In the process of defending himself, Trowa closed him mouth with a snap. “I never considered calling anyone else. Quatre was the first person I thought of,” he admitted softly after a moment.
“He’s made sure he’s the first person you think of and he’s done his job well. I bet before you make any decision you consider, just for a second, what he would think?”
Irritated because it was true, Trowa narrowed his eyes. “How do you know all of this?”
“I’ve had feelings for someone for a long time. Thinking what they would want you to do becomes second nature. It’s a habit you have to work to break and you need to break it as soon as possible.”
“How do you suggest I do that?”
Rolling his eyes, Duo stopped in front of one of the windows and leaned against the frame, looking out into the darkness, “First thing to do is stop calling him. I mean don’t call him at all. After that, stop accepting his calls. When he shows up wherever you are, and he will, let him know you have no reason to speak to him anymore.”
“What do I do when I start dating again, or take a lover?”
“Keep it to yourself until Quatre decides he’s tired of chasing you. The way I see it, you should be able to date publicly in about six or seven years.”
Moving cautiously, Trowa rose from the bed and placed his body behind Duo’s, looking through the windows to see what was so interesting, finding only darkness outside the glass. Using the same tact he had before, he put his hands on the other man’s shoulders and rubbed tense muscles. This time he didn’t stop there, bending down to place his lips on the spot he had been eyeing before, swallowing a moan when realizing Duo’s skin tasted as good as he had believed it would. “What if I don’t want to wait?” he asked quietly, aware what response he would get.
“If you don’t want to wait that long, you’ll still have to wait until you leave here. I can’t sleep with you, Trowa.”
The unexpected phrase had his hands clenching on Duo’s shoulders. Using his teeth, he nipped at the sensitive skin, pleased when he felt the other man tremble. “Can’t? I thought you didn’t want to.”
“I never said I didn’t want to, but I’m not a complete idiot. I will not sleep with you,” Duo stated as he began to move away.
Trowa held him in place, not having to use much effort at all. “You want to sleep with me.”
With a resigned sigh, Duo nodded, “I’d like to, but I won’t.”
“Why not? Are you afraid of Quatre’s reaction?”
“It’s not my largest concern, but it is one of them. I’ve already told you I don’t like complications. My life is simple and that’s how I want it. You are practically wearing a neon sign that screams complication.”
In spite of his words, Duo tilted his head, allowing Trowa better access to his throat. Understanding the move had been unconscious didn’t stop the tall man from taking advantage of the exposed skin, running his tongue up the corded muscle there, hearing Duo gasp. “Why does it have to be complicated? We could enjoy the time I have here then you’d never have to see me again unless you wanted to.” Things were never that easy and Trowa knew he was lying to himself. There were already feelings involved and he didn’t want to take time to search those feelings, already certain he would discover more than simple attraction.
A hiss of frustration came from him when Duo moved away too quickly for him to prevent it. The other man was across the room before he turned, eyes shuttered to hide any emotion. “It’s been a long day and tomorrow will probably be worse. I need to get in bed.”
“That’s what I’ve been trying to do,” Trowa growled.
The only expression Duo gave was a quirk of his eyebrows, but Trowa saw the quick inhale. “I need sleep. I’m up later than I usually am and I have to get up early in the morning.”
Needing to make his point clear, Trowa walked across the room, standing in front of Duo. In a move that was lightning fast, he grasped Duo’s hips and pulled their bodies together, rubbing against the silk-covered erection he found. With his mouth less than an inch away from its counterpart, he spoke softly, “You’ll give me a better reason later, Duo.”
Duo’s eyes burned into his own, “Better reason for what?”
“A better reason for why you won’t sleep with me.”
“I’ve already told you why.”
“I think the reasons you gave me were bullshit,” Trowa stated bluntly, smirking when Duo’s eyes grew large. “You aren’t afraid of Quatre. If you were, you would have moved back to the colonies. As for complications, your life is full of them. Nothing you do here is simple or easy. There’s another reason and I want to know what it is.”
“What are you going to do if I don’t tell you anything? Leave?” Duo sneered, eyes narrowing. “I don’t see what the big deal is. It’s just sex – you can get it anywhere.”
“If it’s just sex, why are you so determined not to sleep with me?”
Duo opened his mouth only to shut it again. After a moment he shook his head slowly. “Sex is easy. Sex with you would be more complicated than I’m willing to deal with, okay? You leave in less than a week, so try to keep your mind on what’s important.”
A day ago, even a few hours ago, Trowa would have been able to list all the items of importance in his life in the order he thought of them. Having Duo held to him, feeling the slim hips flex in his hands and warm breath washing over his lips, he couldn’t remember anything other than what he held. Everything he thought he had understood about himself had been flipped around and continued to be skewed with every minute he stayed near Duo.
“You have a life waiting for you. Once you get to Heero’s you can sort out what you want to do. That’s what’s important, isn’t it?”
“It used to seem so important, but now I’m not so sure,” he mused quietly. Feeling Duo jerk, he dared move his head closer to the other man’s. “I don’t know what’s important anymore.”
He closed the distance between them, could almost feel Duo’s lips on his own when he felt Duo push at his chest. “Trowa, you can’t do this to me. Don’t do this. Please don’t do this.” The near panic he heard had him lifting his head, staring in confusion at the smaller man.
The true bewilderment in Duo’s eyes had him removing his hands and quickly stepping back, heart pounding against his ribs. If the idea hadn’t been so insane he would have thought Duo was afraid of him. “Did someone hurt you?”
“Not the way you mean.” Sitting on the side of the bed, Duo lowered his head, “I’m really tired, Trowa.”
The shaky tone of the words had Trowa wordlessly leaving the room, leaning against the wall in the hallway. It was clear Duo had been hurt, badly. Maybe not physically hurt, but there had been emotional pain involved and it was apparently still with the braided man. He wanted to go back into the bedroom and comfort Duo, wanted to show the smaller man he wouldn’t hurt him, but his feet didn’t move.
Since he remained where he was, he heard the opening of a drawer. Telling himself it was wrong to spy, Trowa peeked around the door and watched as Duo took what appeared to be a photo cube from the small table beside the table. The small man sat on the bed again, gazing at the cube for a long moment before letting it slide from his fingers to land on the floor. “You son of a bitch. You ruined everything.”